Financially Helping Your Adult Children

It is never too late for parents to begin teaching their children about finances, particularly God’s principles of handling money.

If parents find that their grown children are having financial difficulties, this may be a good opportunity to help them get good counsel. Parent’s financial help should be contingent on the children establishing a workable budget and seeking advice on how implement it.

Parents usually have the greatest motives for helping their children, but financial help sometimes may encourage them to be dependent on the parents rather than on God. If God is trying to teach the children discipline and parents step in, the children may have to go through it all over again.

There is nothing wrong with helping adult children if they are truly in need. If their income is adequate and it is being mismanaged they need to learn how to manage their finances more wisely.

Parents can have a major impact on the fortunes of their children by assisting them with the purchase of a home. Often times the children can make payments a mortgage loan requires, but they have difficulty meeting the down payment and the many costs involved with house purchase. A way for parents to help their children purchase a home is to give them money toward the down payment. Most banks demand that this help be in the form of a gift, not a loan. Helping your children pay their mortgage off more quickly may save them thousands of dollars and is a great investment opportunity if parents have surplus funds available. Interest rates are higher if the purchaser has less than a 20% deposit.

Parents will however need wisdom and discernment. There is nothing unscriptural about helping adult children purchase homes, but parents have to weigh the personalities, abilities, and attitudes of their children to ensure that they do not spoil the children. It is optimal for every family to have a debt-free home; so, helping adult children purchase a home can be a great blessing to them if it enables them to become debt free more quickly. But they must be sure that they are not trying to control their children’s lives. If the adult child is a married daughter, parents should be careful not to usurp her husband’s authority. If stepping in will cause the son-in-law to feel that he is an inadequate provider, then parents may need to back away.

They key to helping our children financially is finding ways of helping them to become financially free, since budget stress can be a major factor in marriage breakdown. While caution is required, financial help now may be much better than a larger inheritance later. Plenty to think and pray about.